As I’ve documented a few times on this blog, I am a c-section Mama, my bubs was evacuated via the sunroof, no natural birth here. It wasn’t something I had planned (not that the Irish system allows first time mothers to do that anyway, in my experience), but having not planned for anything I feel that it was definitely an experience less traumatic and mentally punishing than that of women who had hoped and wished for a natural vaginal birth. It’s something I’m happy to talk about; as I see it, my birth experience was no different to that of anyone else. It’s got the drama (monitors beeping madly), the long waiting (24 hours for a bloody gel to start working), a hazy blur of things going on (everything from the lovely gas and air stage) and the ending, where a rather tiny orange little person emerged from where he’d been growing inside me and became my son, the boy prince who could have guest starred on Geordie Shore, such was his lovely orange jaundice.
A parenting group I’m involved in on Facebook recently mentioned that a journalist was looking for C-Section Mothers to give their opinions on a recent group who have emerged spewing hatred and horrible things about C Section Mothers. Saying that we aren’t real mothers because we didn’t give birth vaginally. Saying we need to respect the women who did the hard work and didn’t take the easy way out. Complete and utter shite-arsery that has a real way of getting to you on days where you take everything to heart, which is me quite a lot. The same page has since made similar points against formula feeding mothers (me again) so I reported them to Facebook. This was their response.
It makes me sad that Facebook who have such power for influence on the way people think and do things do not believe that this group, who have also targeted the homeless, the autistic and the atheists, to name but a few, are guilty of harassment or the spreading of hatred on their page. It makes me angry that Facebook have blocked pictures of mothers breastfeeding, of innocent childhood pictures taken by parents, yet this content is considered more wholesome and acceptable than that. I’m not the first person in my social circle to have reported this page; so it really surprised me that they would choose to say no, that we are wrong to object to the content. I’m not for censorship, but I am against the spreading of hate speak and harassment of certain social groups including c-section/formula feeding mothers.
So anyway. Apart from my ranting, my sunroof chat got me talking to that journalist, and it wound up in the Independent on Tuesday, including a lovely photo of me and E. You can check it out here.
What are your thoughts on what these groups are saying? Should they be allowed to say what they like in the name of free speech, or do you agree that they’re just spreading hatred so should be eliminated? Let me know in the comments 🙂
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“Shitearsery” is possibly the greatest word I’ve ever read. I’m going to try and use it in a sentence today.
Glad to have added it to someone elses vocabulary, enjoy, it’s a fantastic word!
Wow.
Just wow.
My c section birth sounds pretty similar to yours, drama drama drama! Less of a mother indeed.
I am actually too gobsmacked to write anymore xx
If anything, recovering from major surgery while bringing up a new baby and adjusting to it was a much harder start to motherhood! Glad to hear we’re on the other side of all the drama now 🙂 Thanks for reading 🙂
A a mother who would have been dead without an emergency C-Section, as would my child, what-ever this page writes is utter crap – no-one is any less of a mother and I can assure you that the pain I went through was no less than with a non C-Section birth. Stupid stupid people.
Exactly! Thanks for reading and for your reply!
Having had 2 sections, the 1st an emergency & the second planned due to baby being breech I certainly don’t feel less of a mother.
I did at times thanks to people’s attitudes thinking I took the easy way out.
Groups and people like this are quite entitled to speak their opinions but it should not be allowed in such a manner. The hatred they spread from a quick glimpse I’ve seen about racism, religion etc is a disgrace.
As you say lesser things have been removed from FB & how this is allowed would make you wonder about FB’S standards!!
I felt relieved when my first child (she was a footling breech) had to come out of the sunroof. I felt I had a ‘get out of jail free’ card and had a great experience of surgery and a great recovery.
I wouldn’t let any idiot group of mis-informed hippies make me feel bad for avoiding what could have been a dangerous birth and for enjoying a stress-free experience.
For my second child, born three weeks ago, I had no excuse and rather reluctantly tried for a VBAC.
While I’m pleased to say I managed to have the vaginal birth, I don’t feel any more or less of a ‘real mother’ than I did with my first.
I just feel more sore and less in control of my pelvic floor muscles.
X
That was the one thing I was pleased with after – no pain when peeing and more control over my pelvic floor!
I think it’s shocking that people can spout rude nonsensical judgemental shite in the name of religion. I am religious, I also gave birth vaginally – because that’s the way it happened, I don’t judge people on their method of giving birth – if the baby comes out and is healthy then the right thing has been done!!! Drives me mad! Whatever is best for mummy and baby is all that matters!!!
Sites like that give other religious people a bad name! There’s also a site dedicated to the hatred of mum’s with tattoos – in that it makes us bad mums! It’s just blooming ridiculous! There’s freedom of speech and then there’s is just being plain rude – did their parents’ not teach them “If you haven’t got something nice to say don’t say anything at all”!?! Great blog by the way!!! 🙂 xxx
Astounding what some people decide to hate others for, isn’t it? I agree with your FI points too. Great post.
FB points. Bloody predictive text!
Don’t worry – I’ve just realised on my initial comment I’ve spelt my own name wrong… oh dear!!! 😛 xxx
Thank you – I think some people just need something to rant about so pick on any little thing. Thanks for reading 🙂
A the proud mother of four ‘sun roof’ delivered children I would just like to point out to this group that the moment I conceived I became a mother…how my children emerged makes me no less, or no more a mother.
That is an excellent point!